November’s Light – Trust and Release for December

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Jenny and me at this year’s Confirmation Retreat

I’ve been so nervous about writing this blog. The last month of 2018 absolutely kicked my ass. When I sat down to try to start writing this past Sunday, I struggled to find lessons about light, trust and release for the end of the year because it seemed like every time I got back on my feet to tackle the end of 2018, something else would knock me down.

As cheesy as it sounds, it took until the first day of 2019 for me to stop and reflect on how grateful I am for the challenges that 2018 handed me because they’re going to make me an even stronger person in 2019.

I’ve held onto a lot of anger in my life because of some things that I’ve been through, and that anger was especially present this holiday season with everything going on. When I was really scrambling for how to handle this (because you can only eat so many Heath bars), I found myself back at Sierra Boggess’s website to remind myself of the word (or in this case, words) for December: Trust and Release.

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My wonderful mother 

I spent much of December praying and putting my trust in God for life to work itself out the way it needs to, and mostly to release my anger. Through the pain and frustration, I’ve spent my December in my living room with candles while sipping on wine and curled up on the couch. I’ve made small splurges for myself and been there for my friends to the best of my abilities.

Throughout the mess that December has been, I’ve made my own light and learned to trust in God and release the pain and anger I’ve felt for so long.

Even if this blog isn’t one of my most profound or lengthy, as always, it feels good to get these feelings out in an honest way.

And again, as cheesy as I’m going to sound, here’s to 2019 and making new memories. I truly can’t wait to see what the new year has to hold for me.

 

 

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